What Is The Point...

...of text messaging on a cell phone? I'm not quite sure that people are understanding the whole concept of it all. Maybe it's just that there is something wrong with me, but I am just not getting this supposedly "wondrous" new fad.

OK, so you pay fifty bucks a month (or whatever, don't write me and tell me what you pay) for a cell phone. You have upteen number of minutes every single month to call and talk to anyone you want. Long distance is free. Nights and weekends are free. It's the easiest thing to use in the world, it's a telephone, for heaven's sake!!!!

Now, instead of using this fast, simple method of communication, you decide instead to turn what would have been a 5 minute conversation into a 60 minute ordeal. Let's say you get one of these oh-so-exciting messages from Sally Sue. Your phone rings (like they do), and instead of just flipping it open or pressing a button to answer, you have to press 5 buttons to get to the stupid message from Sally Sue, (who is extremely quick-witted) saying, "whazzup?" Now it's your turn. You click 5 more buttons, get to your little message screen, and spend the next 10 minutes crafting your clever response by hitting 243 buttons, only to end up with "nuttin". Then you hit "send" and wait. 10 more minutes go by, and here comes the bleeping sound, alerting you that Sally Sue has something extremely important to say. You go through the entire ordeal again, and to your delight you find her message saying, "im wurkin it sux". On and on the cycle goes, sometimes at $.99 per text. These are the same people who will not write a letter on paper because "snail mail" is slow.

Ummmmm, yeah right. I'm not spending $796 to send you stupid dumbass comments when you should have called me for free in the first place. I'm not screwing around with buttons for 3 hours when my own mouth runs at about 7 million words a minute.

Most of my folks know not to bother me with the text crap, except for Jen, who just learned this fun game. She does it constantly; I swear by all that is good in the world, sometimes she CALLS me and tells me that she is going to text me. She can barely use the phone itself; technology flies over her head, and yet she's figured this out. I finally had to program my email into her phone so that they come to my computer instead of my phone.

So don't bother blowing up my phone with texts explaining the wonders of this stupid game. I don't even check my voicemail; I am sure as hell not pushing 3098 damn buttons just to hear that you are going to WalMart today. (Unless you are buying me something at WalMart, in which case....CALL ME ON THE FRIGGIN PHONE!)